Joy Stealers — How to be a Victim

  1. Hook up with joy stealers.
  2. Disrespect yourself enough to allow others to do the same.
  3. Refuse help, therapy, consulting or coaching.
  4. Avoid self-help groups, books and workshops. If you do use any of these helpful modalities, do not follow up on the information and advice available. They can’t mean you.
  5. Convince yourself it will never be different. You cannot possibly change. Besides, the problem is not you, it’s the other people.
  6. Keep eyes looking down, not forward or up. (This allows you to continue to devalue yourself.)
  7. Remain a victim of your past. Refuse to: Feel, Deal, and Heal.

OR, you could… Continue reading

The Ugly Victim

Poor me, poor me, pour me another drink. This is the theme song of the pseudo-victim. I am not talking about real victims, those who have been assaulted, burglarized, or had property destroyed by a hurricane. I am not talking about true victims of disease, cancer or other insidious or progressive illnesses. There is much, however, to learn from these real victims; some of them take on the victim role and milk it for all it’s worth, others live a life of victory over their hardships, never letting on, until you get to know them, that they have had struggles. They refuse to play the role of victim. They work hard to resolve (solve again) their issues.

How many people do you know who have a significant illness, or have survived an accident but have physical consequences, or have a family member with an illness, and never complain? How many people are there in financial trouble who don’t complain? Continue reading